COMMUNICATION II
doc. PhDr. Martina Rašticová, Ph.D.
The course
MPV_COMA Communication and Managerial
Skills Training
Brno, March 6, 2015
SCHEDULE OF LECTURE 6 OF MARCH, 2015
 9:20 – 10:40 part I Presentation skills
 Form and content of presentation
 Presentations and feedback
 10:40 – 11:00 break
 11:00 – 12:45 part II Assertiveness
 Assertive, aggressive, passive behaviour
 Assertive techniques
 Training
 Communication types – interpersonal behaviour
ASSERTIVENESS
 In Latin assere menas claim, affirm, emphasize,
declare
 Self-conident, be responsible for myself, respect
the others, listen to them, cooperate with them
 Assertiveness is often linked to self-esteem.
 In some situations: to be able to say NO, resist
the pressure
 Mostly, understand others, cooperate, find the
consensus
ASSERTIVENESS
 is the quality of being self-assured and confident
without being aggressive.
 In the field of psychology and psychotherapy, it is a
learnable skill and mode of communication.
 passive behaviour: sometimes the way we react
and respond to others can make us feel inadequate,
guilty or regretful.
 aggressive behaviour: we may also feel angry and
critical of others during conversations.
 assertive behaviour: is expressing your thoughts,
emotions, beliefs and opinions in an honest and
appropriate way.
Assertiveness and Rights
Assertiveness can be described as a way to balance the rights of the two parties
involved.
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Importance
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 Zdroj:
http://www.alchemyformanagers.co.uk/topics/U7FcjfSSxK3jHuCS.html
FOR EXAMPLE…
 Aggressive
 you exert your right to have ideas and opinions at the
expense of the other person’s rights. In fact you behave as
if the other person’s rights don’t matter.
 Assertive
 you exert your rights freely, but at the same time recognise
the other person’s rights to be heard, to have pride in what
they do, etc.
 Non-Assertive
 you take too much account of the other person’s rights, to
the extent that you forego some or all of your rights to
express ideas or influence events.
 .
FOR EXAMPLE…
 Aggressive
• “I don’t know how you’ve got the nerve to give me this sort of
stuff for signing. It’s full of mistakes.”
 Assertive
 “Jane, I’d like you to re-do this document as there are
several mistakes in it.”
 Non-Assertive
 “I know it’s er….probably my fault in…. not writing
very clearly, but is there, um….any chance at all you
could find a spare minute to um….just change one or
two small things on this letter for me?” Or you find an
excuse not to take the document back at all.
WHAT DRIVES THESE BEHAVIOURS
 Inner Dialogues can affect the way we respond, for
example:
 Aggressive “If people produce rubbish, I have every
right to tell them so”. “She obviously doesn’t care.
That’s typical of young people today.” “This reflects
badly on me, and I won’t stand for it.”
 Assertive “This may be uncomfortable for us both,
but we can handle it.” “She has the right to make
mistakes, but the responsibility to correct them.” “I
want her to know the effect her errors have on other
people.”
 Non-Assertive “I don’t want to make a scene or
upset our working relationship.” “I’m sure these are
unintentional errors – I’ll let it go this time.” “I know
she’s very busy, so I expect that’s why these mistakes
happened.”
 Being aware of these Inner Dialogues can help
us consider our response and adjust behaviour
to be assertive!
ASSERTIVE PEOPLE
 feel free to express their feelings, thoughts, and desires;
 are also able to initiate and maintain comfortable
relationships with other people;
 know their rights;
 have control over their anger. This does not mean that
they repress this feeling; it means that they control anger
and talk about it in a reasoning manner;
 are willing to compromise with others, rather than
always wanting their own way ... and tend to have good
self-esteem;
 enter friendships from an 'I count my needs. I count your
needs' position".
ASSERTIVE TECHNIQUES I
 Fogging
 Fogging is a useful technique if people are behaving in a
manipulative or aggressive way.
 Fogging is so termed because the individual acts like a
'wall of fog' into which arguments are thrown, but not
returned.
 involves agreeing with any truth that may be contained
within statements, even if critical. By not responding in
the expected way, in other words by being defensive or
argumentative, the other person will cease
confrontation as the desired effect is not being achieved.

Find more at: http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ps/assertiveness-
techniques.html#ixzz2vpzAfket
FOGGING
 Example Situation
 “What time do you call this? You're nearly half an
hour late, I'm fed up with you letting me down all the
time.”
 Fogging response:
 “Yes, I am later than I hoped to be and I can see
this has annoyed you.”
 “Annoyed? Of course I'm annoyed, this has left me
waiting for ages. You really should try to think about
other people a bit more.”
 Fogging response:
 “Yes, I was concerned that you would be left
waiting for almost half an hour.”
 “Well... why were you late?”
ASSERTIVE TECHNIQUES II
 The Stuck Record Technique
 employs the key assertive skill of 'calm
persistence.
 It involves repeating what you want, time and time
again, without raising the tone of your voice,
becoming angry, irritated, or involved in side issues.
THE STUCK RECORD TECHNIQUE
 Example Situation
 Imagine that you are returning something that is faulty to
a store. The conversation may go as follows.
 “I bought these shoes last week and the heels have
fallen off. I would like a refund please.”
 “It looks like they've been worn a lot and these shoes were
only designed for occasional wear.”
 Stuck Record technique response:
 “I have only had them a week and they are faulty. I
would like a refund please.”
 “You cannot expect me to give you your money back after
you've worn them out.”
 Stuck Record technique response:
 “The heels have fallen off after only a week and I
would like a refund please.”

ASSERTIVE TECHNIQUES III
 Positive enquiry is a simple technique for
handling positive comments such as praise
and compliments.
 People often struggle with responding to praise
and compliments, especially those with lower
self-esteem as they may feel inadequate or that
the positive comments are not justified.
 Positive enquiry is used to find out more
details about the compliment or praise
given, and agree with it.
POSITIVE ENQUIRY
 Example Situation
 Sender:
 “You made an excellent meal tonight, it was
delicious!”
 Receiver:
 “Thanks. Yes, it was good. What did you like about it
in particular?”
 This is different from a passive response that may
have been:
 "It was no effort" or "It was just a standard recipe"
ASSERTIVE TECHNIQUES IV
 Negative Enquiry
 The opposite of positive enquiry is negative
enquiry.
 Negative enquiry is a way to respond to more
negative exchanges such as receiving criticism.
 Negative enquiry is used to find out more about
critical comments and is a good alternative to
more aggressive or angry responses to criticism.
NEGATIVE ENQUIRY
 Example Situation
 Sender:
 “That meal was practically inedible, I can't
remember the last time I ate something so awful”
 Receiver:
 “It wasn't the best, exactly what didn’t you like
about it?”
 This is different from an aggressive response that
may have been:
 "How dare you, I spent all afternoon preparing
that meal" or "Well that's the last time I cook for
you"
WHY IS IT DIFFICULT TO SAY NO?
 If I say no,they may feel hurt or injected
 If I say no this time, they may not like me
anymore
 If I say no this time,they may never ask again
 They won’t take any notice if I say no
 They would say ‘yes’ to me (and so I will feel
guilty if I refuse them)
 I can’t say no, because I feel sorry for them
HOW TO SAY „NO“ ASSERTIVELY
 Start your reply with a clear ,firm,audible ‘no’.
 Do not justify or make excuses. Giving a reason is
different from over-appologizing.
 Feel that you have a right to say no.
 Once you have said ‘no’ , do not stay around
waiting to be persuaded to change your mind.
Make a definite closure by changing the
subject,walking away, continiuing with what you
are doing-whatever is appropriate.
HOW TO SAY „NO“ ASSERTIVELY
CONTINUES
 Remember you are saying ‘no’ to that particular
request,not rejecting the person.
 If the request takes you unawares or you have
not sufficent time to think when asked,you can
always say, ‘I will let you know’ in order to give
yourself time to think about what you want to
say.
 Take responsibility for saying no-do not blame
the other person for asking you.
 Ask for more information if you need it in order
to decide whether you want to say ‘yes’ or ‘no’.
WHY IS IT DIFFICULT TO SAY „YES“
 I don’t deserve it.
 They might not really mean it.
 I am not really sure that is what I want.
 I don’t have enough information.
HOW TO SAY „YES“ ASSERTIVELY
 Say ‘yes’ clearly and definitely.
 Identify why you would find it difficult.
 Examine thoughts realistically and ask yourself.
 Having calarified thughts for yourself then
reaffirm your desire to say ‘yes’.
IN WHAT SITUATIONS DO YOU FIND IT
DIFFICULT TO ASSERT YOURSELF?
 Exercise:
 In groups of 3 or 4, identify one situation each in
which you find it difficult to assert yourself?
• What gets in your way?
• How do you feel?
• How does the other person react?
• Choose, and be prepared to share an example
from your group
What Are the Benefits of Behaving
Assertively?
TEST YOURSELF
 http://psychologytoday.tests.psychtests.com/take_
test.php?idRegTest=3195
 Be assertive, change your thinking
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XI5XBKZZBIc
 Tips for being assertive
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ubSL1tFmgDc
 Training videos good!:
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kW6_U4e5DVI&lis
t=PL1ACDDEFDD444060B
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HVF2bg_BMqk
 Good web page:
 http://www.psychologytoday.com/basics/assertiveness
THE INTERPERSONAL CIRCUMPLEX
THEORY AND MODEL
 model for conceptualizing, organizing, and
assessing interpersonal behavior, traits, and
motives (Wiggins, 2003),
 was initially inspired by Harry Stack Sullivan
(1953) and later realized as a model by Timothy
Leary (1957).
 These theories suggest that we can understand
people's personality in social situations by using
only two basic personality trait dimensions. The
two traits can have many names depending on
the specific theory but here we will conceptualize
them as agency and communion.
INTERPERSONAL CIRCUMPLEX MODEL
 Source: http://webspace.ship.edu/tosato/interpc.htm
SOURCES REGARDING COMMUNICATION
 Burgoon, J.K., Buller, D.B., Woodall, W.G. (1989):
Nonverbal Communication: The Unspoken Dialogue.
New York: Harper and Row.
 DeVito, J.A. (1993): Essentials of Human
Communication. Harper Collins College Publ. ISBN
0-06-500454-X.
 Hayes, N. (1998): Psychology. An Introductory text.
Thomas Nelson and Sons. ISBN 0-17-490056-2.
 Heath, R.L., Bryant, J. (2000): Human
Communication. Theory and Research: Concepts,
Context, Challenges. Lawrence Erlbaum. ISBN
0805830081
 Munter, M. (2006): Guide to Managerial
Communication. Pearson Education. ISBN
0131467042
SOURCES REGARDING THE INTERPERSONAL
CIRCUMPLEX THEORY AND MODEL
 Fiske, S.T., Cuddy, A.J.C., Glick, P., Xu,J. A model of (often mixed) stereotype
content: Competence and warmth respectively follow from the perceived status
and competition. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2002, č. 82, s.
878-902.
 Fiske, S.T., Cuddy, A.J.C., Glick, P. Universal dimension of social cognition:
warmth and kompetence. Trends in Cognitive Science, 2006, roč. 11, č.2, s. 77-
83.
 Leary, T. (1957). Interpersonal diagnosis of personality. New York: Ronald.
 Mead, G. H. (1934). Mind, self and society. Chicago: University of Chicago
Press.
 Marcus, H.R., Kitayama, S. Culture and the self: Implications for cognition,
emotion, and motivation. Psychological Review, 1991, č. 98, s. 224-253.
 Pardone, T., Bales, R. Family, socialization, and interaction processes. Glencoe,
Scotland: Free Press, 1955.
 Pryor, F.I. The Future of U.S. Capitalism. Cambridge University Press, 2002.
 Pulhaus, D.L., John, O.P. Egoistic and moralistic bias in self-perception: The
interplay of self-depictive styles with basic traits and motives. Journal of
Personality, 1998, č. 66, s. 1025-1060.
SOURCES CONTINUE
 Rašticová, M. Potkáme-li cizince: Jak vnímáme druhého člověka? Psychologie
dnes, 2009, č. 10, s. 54-55.
 Rosenberg, S., Nelson, C., Vivekananthan, P. A multidimensional approach to
the structure of personality impressions. Journal of Personality and Social
Psychology, 1968, č. 9, s. 283-294.
 Sullivan, H. S. (1953). The interpersonal theory of psychiatry. New York:
Norton.
 Terman, L.M., Miles, C.C. Sex and personality. New York: McGraw Hill, 1936.
 Triandis, H.C. Individualism and collectivism. Boulder, CO: Westview Press,
1995.
 Wiggins, J. S. (1982). Circumplex models of interpersonal behavior in clinical
psychology. In P. C. Kendall & J. N. Butcher (Eds.), Handbook of research
methods in clinical psychology (pp. 183-221). New York: Wiley.
 Wiggins, J. S., Phillips, N., & Trapnell, P. (1989). Circular reasoning about
interpersonal behavior: Evidence concerning some untested assumptions
underlying diagnostic classification. Journal of Personality and Social
Psychology, 56, 296-305.
 Wiggins, J. S., & Trobst, K. K. (1997). When is a circumplex an "interpersonal
circumplex"? The case of supportive actions. In R. Plutchik & H. R. Conte
(Eds.), Circumplex models of personality and emotions (pp. 57-80). Washington,
DC: American Psychological Assoication.
ELECTRONIC SOURCES
 http://www.skillsyouneed.com/ps/assertiveness-
techniques.html#ixzz2vpzAfket
 http://webspace.ship.edu/tosato/interpc.htm
 Business Communication
http://stu.westga.edu/~ahinson1/abed6107/busine
ss_comm_index.htm
 and more were presented during communication
Thanks for your attention.